I asked 3 people for an L word, and guess what? They all said, ‘Love’ immediately.
It’s a word everybody uses all the time, probably multiple times a day. You’re not surprised, right? Turn on the radio (if you still have one) or peruse your ipod. What do you hear? Probably love songs. Go to the movies (or watch one on Netflix). What is the most common theme? Some love triangle, yes?! If you’re describing something you like a lot, you probably say, “I love chocolate ice cream”, or “I love shopping at the Mall”, or “I love reading murder mysteries.” Or, “My Spot is the best dog in the world! I just love him to bits!” And possibly you’ll say, tongue dripping with sarcasm, “I just LOVE it when I miss the train!”
In other words, it’s one of our favorite words to say because it has so many uses. And I haven’t even mentioned the most powerful use of all- when we say, “I love you” to that special person and hope s/he says it right back. If we’re honest, we probably spend a good deal of our time thinking about being loved (or not) by another person we care about.
Does Love Really Make the World Go ‘Round?
It is often said that “love makes the world go ‘round.” But I tend to disagree. I think what really makes the world go ‘round is our fear that we won’t have love; that somehow love will pass us by. Or be insincere. Look at our love songs- he left me, she broke my heart, I’m desperate for hir. There is so much fear around love. Think Romeo and Juliet. Star-crossed love. Unrequited love. Inappropriate love. This very powerful emotion colors so much of our life, our art, our society. It may be unacknowledged but nonetheless, a very potent influence on everything we do. Dare I mention politics?!
Where is Love?
So, when we talk about love, it’s about loving someone or something in the world around us. Loving our work, loving to eat, loving to dance, loving to play whatever it is. When you love something, it’s a thing – I love this. Fill in the blank. And God forbid, s/he, it doesn’t love us back. Then we quickly become the victim of that person or thing. The love object is now a tremendous threat to our peace of mind. We’ve put our heart on our sleeve and it’s been rejected. Not a pleasant place to be.
Thus far, everything I’ve mentioned about love has been dependent on an external stimulus. There’s a lover and a beloved. And our happiness seems to hinge on how dependable the beloved is. One false step and love can suddenly shift to anger and even malice. The passion that once filled us with an unquenchable desire to be with our loved one turns to revulsion. In fury, we cast out the turncoat to hide our hurt and despair.
New Slant on Love
Let’s talk about how we can look at the word from an inner perspective. In my spiritual practice, love is not an emotion but an eternal truth. It is the glue that holds the universe together. It is the expression of life in its pure, unadulterated form. It does not change or diminish because of external circumstances. It is always patient and kind, as the Bible says.
And, it is not special. Love is like the rain that falls on the wicked and the good equally. It doesn’t choose sides. I laugh when I see the teams on bended knee praying to win. Does God play favorites? If God is Love, I don’t think so!
How to Love
So how do we translate this understanding of love as changeless with the concept of our special loves that come and go? Nothing less than a rewiring of our belief that love comes from without to the realization that love starts and ends within me!
In other words, if I want to see love, I must be love. That’s how it happens. It has to start with me and go out. Think how powerful this idea is, because it’s true for every single idea that i have. When i have a thought, it’s in my mind and then that energy flows out to the world and it gets fulfilled. A hundred years ago, Albert Einstein, one of our greatest thinkers, had an idea which led to so much of our current technology –the concept that when you put an idea out there, it will manifest.
This begs the question, “What does it mean if I don’t like somebody or some situation?” This is hard to hear but life-changing if you can grasp it– It means you have chosen not to like that person or thing! The thought begins within and is displayed without. The reason this is life-changing is because you are no longer a victim of external circumstances. Now, you can choose to love that person or thing instead.
The holiday season is fast approaching– being with family, maybe with some you love, and some you don’t love so much, you just kind of put up with. See if you can change your perspective. See if you can say “I am a loving being. I am filled with the desire to share my love, my beingness. I want to be the gift of love to the people that I meet this season.”
Go out there, starting today, and be the love, be the gift of love to everyone you meet, and i guarantee you, you will have the best holiday season you have ever had.
Peace and Love Always,
If you are interested in finding out more about MarciaGrace’s ‘Sitting” training program, email her at firstname.lastname@example.org