It happens out of the blue, you’re not expecting anything out of the norm and yet, boom, there it is.
So, what do you do, how do you handle it when a crisis blindsides you?
Abundance is a perfect conversation for what we’re talking about here because, well,
- My understanding of abundance is about living your life from the inside out, as opposed to re-acting to what’s going on outside of you.
- Abundance is having financial security, physical security and emotional security.
- An abundant attitude comes from self-confidence and peace of mind.
- An abundant mentality allows you to understand yourself, and take care of your own needs.
- Abundant thinking naturally wants to share and to be of service to other people — to your family, your friends, your business associates, and really anyone who you can help.
My daughter went into the hospital two weeks ago Sunday night with a severe kidney infection. We thought that she was going to lose her kidney function all together but fortunately that has not happened. She spent six days at Mather Hospital with intravenous antibiotics, a fluid to keep her hydrated, and a Foley catheter. Pacing the floors at home were her husband and four children, all extremely upset.
Needless to say, when the fulcrum of the family is out of service, usually known as ‘mother’, things start to fall apart.
As businesswomen running businesses, we know if we’re not in good shape, if we’re not functioning optimally, everything around us is going to sputter.
I thought, as a mother and a businesswoman, I would share with you how I am handling this crisis situation. We have a very small family– it’s just myself, my son and his kids, and my daughter and her family, and a couple of other family members who are far away. My husband passed in 2010 and my sister is in Boston.
Therefore, everything falls on me to pick up and help when something like this happens in one of my kid’s families. So that’s what I’ve done. I went to my daughter’s to cook and help with homework. I took 2 of the boys food shopping .We came home and made dinner together. One of the boys put the groceries away, another set the table, the third one chopped an onion and the forth one helped clean up afterwards. I tried to keep them busy, to maintain as much normalcy as possible.
And of course I’m concerned too. I don’t know what’s going to happen with her. We were told she’s going to need surgery. So, all of this uncertainty is very unsettling for everybody.
Fortunately, I have tools. I have physical, mental and spiritual tools to get me through difficult times like this. That’s why I wanted to share with you how I’ve been coping, because I don’t know what the outcome is going to be– we’re right in the middle of this– but I know I will get through it whatever comes our way.
First, I have a strong love for my family and when you have a strong love, you can and will find strength you didn’t know you had. If you’re really passionate about your business and something goes wrong, of course you’re going to be upset, but if you have tools, you’ll be able to work through it because of your love, because you care, because you are able.
And so you just do it. This is mental abundance!
The second thing, (and this is something that many of us just skip right over because we get totally immersed in the crisis) is I remember to take care of myself. And the reason I say this is because it’s so easy to forget to take care of yourself. You start running around, making phone calls, going here and there trying to get information from an army of doctors. You’re trying to keep the family together, visiting the patient in the hospital. It’s mentally and physically exhausting.
I recognized the best way I can take care of them is first to take care of me. So every single day, the very first thing I do is my morning practice. I know if I don’t spend some ‘sacred time’ immediately upon awakening, monitoring my thoughts and organizing my day, I am totally discombobulated. The rest of the day, I’m trying to play catch-up.
It goes like this: I do a few minutes of stretching just to loosen up my body, especially when I’m under unusual pressure and stress. The body’s all tensed up so it is crucial to alleviate the tension.
Next, I take 5 slow deep breaths in and out. (If you’ve been with me for any length of time you know we’ve done many types of breathing exercises.) The breath oxygenates my brain and centers me in the NOW. It’s one of the most valuable things to do when you are under stress.
Once my body is relaxed and my thoughts are focused, I write down whatever comes to mind–what I’m concerned about, something I need to tell somebody, errands I need to run, and so on.
Then I put my pen down and close my eyes. I allow myself to sink down into my heart center where I get in touch with my inner wisdom. I imagine a beautiful blossom opening up and spilling forth whatever I need to know at that moment.
The whole process doesn’t take more than 15 minutes although I often allow more time because it makes me feel so good! It’s hard to express the joy that comes from finding that gentle, still place where everything falls away and I float in a sea of peace. I leave my bed feeling refreshed, energized and prepared for my day. This is spiritual abundance!
Lastly, if I have time, I read from A Course in Miracles, which is my spiritual path. It’s amazing how the particular passage I read that day will be the perfect thing I need to hear to center me or even address an issue I’m having. It reminds me I am nurtured and supported by a loving Source. And when you feel cared about, then you can care for others.
Doing this is essential for me. We all have little rituals that we do throughout the day. And often, when you’re in the middle of a crisis, you can’t do everything that you would normally do. So you have to figure out what’s essential, what’s a must—“I must feed and walk the dog.” You must have a ‘must do’ list, and then an ‘if I can get to it, I’ll do it’ list.
Another very important thing, in my case in particular because I’m dealing with my family, is to keep the lines of communication open. A crisis throws everybody involved off-kilter and they often retreat into their own personal misery and forget to reach out for help or to give support to others.
An abundant mentality encourages you to think of how you can be a communication link between all affected parties.
So I would go to the hospital and visit my daughter- just be there for her, be a calming agent, and assure her things would work out and everything would be fine– and then go to her house and speak with her husband and kids with the latest news. My job was to let them know what’s happening so they wouldn’t start making up all kinds of horrible stories that would never happen. When we’re nervous and upset, we tend to think the worst –everybody’s going to die, the world’s coming to an end– so communication is vital to maintain some semblance of sanity in distressed minds!
Along the same lines, the kids were missing their mom terribly and weren’t allowed in to be with her so I came up with a plan for the kids to come to the hospital and stand outside the window where she could look out and talk to them ‘in the flesh’!
I was also glad when I could be there when one of the doctors came in to talk to her. She was fuzzy-headed from the assault on her body and not really able to retain everything the doctor said so I recorded the conversations so we could discuss it later.
Again, this is a perfect example of abundance, because to me, abundance means to live your life from the inside, out–finding out what you need for yourself, and then going out there and doing whatever it is that you’re guided to do so that you can be of service to yourself and to others. Everybody benefits under those conditions and that’s what true abundance is!
Acknowledging your abundance, using your tools, keeps you in service mode as opposed to, “why me” mode– that ego thing that cries, “why is this happening to me and why do I have to do everything?” So, when I’m in service mode, that doesn’t happen. It’s all about, “what can I do next to take care of this situation?”
Find, maintain and grow your Abundance Mentality and see your business and personal life transform!
Peace and Love Always,
I always tell you that I’m here for you because I want you to know that you have all the answers that you need within you, even if the answer you get is, “Go get help from so and so.” That answer will send you in the right direction so you can be the calm, creative, joyful and successful businesswoman you are meant to be!
By now I hope you know that I teach busy businesswomen how to start the day with intention and an Abundant Mentality. If you would like to have a 30-minute chat with me to uncover some of the blocks that are keeping you from the success that an abundant mentality will offer you, you will find my calendar here to set up a time.
Come join my Facebook group for instant support in chaotic times: It’s a place where we can talk to each other; we can express our feelings and our thoughts about any issue.
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Calm, Creative, Joyful for The Busy BusinessWoman
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