It’s crucial that you learn to shift your internal beliefs if you want to be happy and abundant. You often don’t even register the negative self-talk going on in your thoughts. For example, “I should have done ___ instead”, or, “ Why didn’t I go right away?”, or, “I wonder what they think of me?”
That kind of thinking creates conflict as your conscious mind attempts to block out the unpleasant thoughts. This is what I call being on ‘ego automatic’, a thought pattern based on focusing only on external prompts as the truth. That’s the way we are most of the time, so it takes a conscious decision to shift the way we think, to restore our calm center.
Therefore, you need to examine your internal beliefs to find out who you really are. When you discover your true self, amazing things can happen! You realize that ideas you’ve had all your life are not in alignment with who you are today. Then you can make informed decisions about what ideas to keep and which to let go.
Those beliefs are buried beneath your need to please others or your fear of upsetting the apple cart of your relationships, and even quite possibly, your work. And it isn’t until you are confident in yourself that you will look at those beliefs dispassionately and determine if they are useful to you.
I know this can be a difficult process at first. It wasn’t pleasant to think about mistakes I had made, or opportunities I passed up because of fear. But as time went on, I continued to gain confidence. I would often light a candle to help me focus on my internal dialogue. I’d watch the flame until my eyes closed and my mind began to spiral in. That was my earliest method of initiating my shift in consciousness.
Let’s play a little self-discovery game.
What I would like you to do if you can do it now, is get a piece of paper and pen and write down seven things that you believe about yourself, in your personal life and in your business life. If you want to write more you can but seven is fine. For example,
- I’m a good writer
- I’m passionate about my work.
- I like to watch a movie to relax. And so on. You can include less stellar characteristics:
- I’m impatient when people don’t get to the point.
- I hate getting stuck in traffic.
Next, write down seven things you think other people think about you. It may be some of the same things or maybe it’ll be different things of how you believe other people perceive you.
Even if you are not able to do this right now, do this a little bit later in a quiet moment or tomorrow morning when you wake up and the house is still. Nobody’s up yet. Do this because you are going to be amazed, especially if you do the last thing that I’m going to ask you to do.
WARNING!! Don’t do this if you have difficulty accepting criticism.
This takes a bit of an effort, and a pot full of courage, granted, but it might be incredibly eye opening. So be prepared! Okay, here it comes>>>>The third thing that you need to do is ask your family and friends to list the top seven things they think about you, good and otherwise! Tell them to type the list on a paper and leave it anonymously in an envelope in your mailbox. Maybe they think you talk too much. (Who knows, I might get a few of those in my box!) Of course, you can ask anybody, but they should know you fairly well. You want to tell them to be as honest as possible. If there’s something about you that people find annoying, they’re not going to tell you to your face but anonymously, they might do it. (And you will be the better for hearing it.)
So, what the heck, if you’re willing to take the risk, go for it. Or at least do the first 2 parts. This is risky but we’re entrepreneurs. We have to be risk takers. No one ever got to be a great success without the willingness to step out of their comfort zone.
So you want to try this and just see what happens, and I’d love to hear how it goes– what kind of responses you get. How you felt about the exercise. Keep in mind, your ego has a tendency to fabricate and to rationalize so when you’re making your list of the seven things that you believe about yourself, (be as honest as possible), I want you to really think about what you know to be true about yourself. And that can be tough.
But I’ll tell you something, if you’re willing to make the effort, it will save you years of frustration and disappointment. It will help you to clarify who you really are. And that’s why this is that important, because when you know who you really are, then that becomes your baseline for discovering what the next step is for you to take that will bring you up a notch in your own estimation.
Peace and Love Always,
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By now I hope you know that I teach busy businesswomen how to start the day with intention and an Abundant Mentality. If you would like to have a 30-minute chat with me to uncover some of the blocks that are keeping you from the success that an abundant mentality will offer you, drop me an email. Put in the subject line, “Chat” and then I will send you my calendar to set up a time.
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Everything Begins with a Thought
In my new book, Calm, Creative, Joyful: Lessons in Transforming Your Life, you will acquire abilities you didn’t know you had, to transform the thoughts that hurt so that your life becomes a play of endless opportunities for success and happiness.
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